Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Teacher Calls Student ‘Prostitute,’ I Think She Deserves an Award
In a suburb of Washington D.C., a Germantown teacher was forced to apologize to a student after telling her she was dressed like a prostitute.
The Seneca Valley High School teacher made the remark Thursday and had a security guard escort the student to the main office, said Naomi Lynn, the girl’s mother. The incident was first reported by WJLA (Channel 7). Lynn said she wasn’t satisfied with the response; after a one-day absence, the teacher returned to class Tuesday, Lynn said.
“If my daughter had called her a prostitute, [the school] would have suspended her,” she said. The teacher “needs to be punished for what she did.”
Dana Tofig, a school system spokesman, said that he couldn’t comment on personnel matters, but that the teacher’s comment was “inappropriate.”
I personally want to thank this teacher for having the guts to say what so many teachers and school administrators are afraid to say.
Whatever happened to enforcing standards in our schools? I remember our principal would get on us if our jeans were a little too tight. At some point, it seems the school community just gave up:
You want to wear a thong hanging out of your jeans, you want to have your boobies falling out, your ass cheeks popping out of your low-riders, no problem.
Notably, the only person the parent in the above story is mad at is the teacher. She’s mad at the teacher for speaking the truth about her daughter. As a result, the teacher was suspended for a day, however, the mother seems to think this punishment was too light. Something tells me she needs to worry more about her daughter than this teacher’s career.
Children learn what is and isn’t appropriate from adults. How will this young lady ever learn how to function as a lady if her parents and school administrators, the people who spend the most time with her and are most influential in shaping her life, just let her run wild?
We forget that high school students are a mix of adult-bodies and children-brains. Many young women want to look like their favorite video hos but don’t understand the ramifications of the way they dress.
They don’t understand how they will be perceived, they don’t understand that they will invite more trouble than they can handle. And because they don’t understand, it is up to us to tell them and make them understand.
Whatever happened to “you are not going out the house like that”? I think it is the responsibility of the community and the schools need to step in.
And although teens will be defiant, won’t listen and pack a bag with a change of clothes, at least we will have shown them that there is a standard and they can choose to meet it or not.
Although we all acted out as teens, most of us at least had a moral compass that was enforced by our parents, so we knew we were wrong and would just pray we didn’t get caught.
But what happens when children don’t have a moral compass to start from? When there is no clear distinction between right and wrong? When your bad choices go unchallenged? When adults will accept anything in the name of keeping them happy and avoiding conflict at all costs? What happens?
To stand around and passively endorse their inappropriate dress with our inaction is unforgivable. Look at all those awful prom pictures (like the one pictured above) that circulate each year with a bunch of scantily clad young women. The schools may as well go all the way and set up a pole in the middle of the gymnasium.
I always wonder, Where are the parents? And if the parents are dumb enough to let their kids come out like that, where are the school administrators? They should have turned around those girls at the door and told them that they were inappropriately dressed for a school function.
I know we’re only talking about clothes, but it’s larger than that. We cannot underestimate the importance of teaching young women how to present themselves to the world. This is a lesson that can make the difference between a girl growing up believing she’s only good for one thing and a girl that knows she has so much more to offer than her body.
Whether we use shame, positive enforcement, punishment or some Dr.Phil hybrid of the three, we MUST demonstrate to our children that standards do exist. There is acceptable and unacceptable. And it is adults, not children, who will decide which is which. This girl was in the 10th grade, and I personally think she’s old enough to be told she’s dressed like a prostitute. The real problem is that her mother didn’t tell her first.
Peace people…
Missthg
on 16 Mar 2010 at 4:01 pm #
You know it’s a ridiculous thing for the mother to demand an apology from the teacher. If anything - she should have been ashamed that her daughter left the house looking like a hooker. It’s really sad that the mother didn’t check her daughter. Teachers have enough to do without having to police ill dressed children. Why is it ok for the kids to go to school looking like that? I couldnt walk around the house like that let alone leave the house and be a representative of my family. You are 100% right - that teacher needs to be commended.
Patrick
on 16 Mar 2010 at 4:19 pm #
Here’s a link to an AP video that has a picture of what the girl was wearing and an interview with her and the mother.
http://bit.ly/b0Qk4N
Anonymous 13
on 17 Mar 2010 at 2:46 am #
I watched the video and saw the photo of what she was supposedly wearing at the time. It was less skanky than I was expecting it to be…but I feel that the real issue is that in our litigious society, every adult who is in a position of authority over a young person feels that they have to think twice before they say anything harsh or “judgemental”, lest over-sensitive parents get the ACLU involved (instead of acknowledging that perhaps the person who called their kid out is correct).
It appears to me that the mother of this girl is really young - so it’s probably another case of a teenager having a baby and as soon as the child starts resembling an adult in any way, the parental responsibilities are over and the child becomes mom’s friend because she’s “grown”.
I have to say that I am curious as to whether the teacher is white. If the teacher was black, I imagine there would have been no media coverage, because it probably would have been a non-issue.
People need to stop getting so offended when other people call them out.
Mamadoc
on 17 Mar 2010 at 9:35 am #
All I could think as I read about the incident is that just wasn’t the beginning of it all. Perhaps I’m wrong but I’m thinking it wasn’t even about what the girl was wearing that day but possibly more about the teacher being worn down day after day. I think that was the day the teacher probably just broke and said something a lot less hurtful than what she probably truly wanted to say.
Mamadoc’s last blog post..All of Us
MrShabazz
on 17 Mar 2010 at 12:15 pm #
I’m torn here. That outfit was much less provocative than what I was expecting to see.
However its true that back in our day administrators really did police what was and what wasn’t appropriate without any shame. About 85% of the time they were fully supported and backed by parents. That is if you did manage to leave the house escaping your mothers attention.
Going back to what someone said earlier, if you’re 15 years old and your mother is only 30 (practically the same generation) she’s not liable to have much of a problem with it though.
ichannel on 17 Mar 2010 at 12:59 pm #
‘Teacher calls student a prostitute; I think she deserves an award’…
…
Kellye
on 17 Mar 2010 at 1:50 pm #
MrShabazz said, “if you’re 15 years old and your mother is only 30 (practically the same generation) she’s not liable to have much of a problem with it though.”
Unfortunately, I know people (relatives) who were almost 30 when they had their children, and still want to be a friend, rather then a parent!
Chris B
on 17 Mar 2010 at 2:04 pm #
I get offended by people who can’t read.
Nobody called anyone a prostitute. A teacher said that a student was dressed like a prostitute. If she’d said the student was dressed like Britney Spears, would that mean she had called her Britney Spears? (No, it would mean she was dressed like a prostitute… hold on, I’m getting confused.)
Based on the video, I’d say she was dressed more like a welfare recipient than a prostitute, but maybe prostitute fashion has been going down-market.
JoAnne
on 17 Mar 2010 at 3:08 pm #
I don’t know why this student was singled out because it seems to me that a lot of teenage girls today are buying their clothes at “sluts r us”. I am always appalled not only at the girls’ clothes but their behavior as well when in public. The boys dress like gang members and act tough and the girls act like airheads who are easy. Shame on parents who tolerate the look and the behavior. Maybe I’m getting old but whatever happened to looking nice?
KingBiz
on 17 Mar 2010 at 3:27 pm #
i could write a novel on this topic. i am inclined to agree with the teacher. our society wants to know why there is an abundance of pedophiles out there…smh
Osumashi Kinyobe
on 17 Mar 2010 at 3:39 pm #
Question: did anyone put the mother on the spot? Forget about the teacher for a moment. When I was a teen-ager, I wasn’t allowed to dye my hair, wear certain garments or stay out past a certain hour. All of this is because my parents were concerned about me. Did anyone point out that this woman should have gotten off her @$$ and done some parenting YEARS ago? If the girl dresses like a hooker, she will be treated as such. Surely, a mother who takes the time to complain cares about THAT!
Osumashi Kinyobe’s last blog post..A Very Special Saint Patrick’s Day Post
bianca
on 17 Mar 2010 at 3:46 pm #
if i was that girls mother i would have been upset if you told my daughter she was dress like a prostitue.their was another way the teacher could have handel that young lady with out her going to name calling.then again my daughter would not have made it out of the house for people to say she look like one.where was this child mother when she left the house.mothers and father need to make sure they see and know what their daughters and sons are wearing before they step out side the house.this girls mother need to have a conversation with her daughter and let her know how young women should dress.in and out side of school.
tenACEous
on 17 Mar 2010 at 4:53 pm #
Okay, am I the only one who thinks what the teacher said was stupid and EXTRA? I’m an educator, but an ADULT first and foremost. “Young lady, what you have on is inappropriate. Go to the office.” See how easy that was? No extras needed or necessary for that matter. A polo shirt and leggings, is that what prostitutes are wearing these days?? For crying out loud don’t bring negative attention to yourself, especially not in an age where every parent has a freakin lawyer on deck.
Perhaps you should save that award for the teacher who stands up to the enabling, abrasive parents, not an idiot who lacks tact.
Brett_McS
on 17 Mar 2010 at 7:18 pm #
Two words: School Uniforms.
Saves a whole lot’a hassle. Especially for girls. “Oh, what do I wear today…”.
Cathee
on 17 Mar 2010 at 7:25 pm #
I agree with tenACEous, the teacher’s words were inappropriate. However, as another blogger stated, teachers do get worn down, and they are only human. As another educator, I’ve been called on the carpet for responding to a student who stated that her life goal was to get on welfare, that welfare is not a goal but rather a safety net. Problem: litigous parents on welfare who called the principal saying that I had made a disparaging remark to their daughter, and that they were on welfare and I had berated them by my remark. Schools and educators are pushed around by these lawyer-parents (show me a child with behavioral problems and I’ll show you a defense lawyer of a parent). Schools are expected to perform near miracles, all while being hog-tied by politicians and bleeding heart/ignorant parents. In my experience, regardless of race, language, or socio-economic standing, the biggest difference I see in a child’s ability to achieve is parental expectations and values. Education is no longer valued or respected as it once was, teachers are certainly not supported like they once were. It continues downhill, and America will pay the price someday. As the saying goes, if you think education is expensive, look at the cost of ignorance.
David
on 18 Mar 2010 at 11:04 am #
Maybe the teacher should have told her she was “dressed like a sex worker” instead….
shannon
on 18 Mar 2010 at 12:22 pm #
Are schools just too tired to enforce dress codes anymore? My school had strict rules: skirts no more than three inches above the knee (short side of an index card used to measure), no tank tops or sleeveless shirts, nothing too tight, etc. If your teacher thought you were in violation, you got sent to the principal’s office, where there was an ample supply of khaki pants and shirts with the school logo emblazoned on them. It only took one day of having to wear that ensemble around school for you to become much more cautious about your sartorial choices.
Not that I would know, because a) I did not own skank-a-licious clothes, since my parents purchased and therefore approved my wardrobe; and b) on the one or two occasions I did manage to pull together something inappropriate, my dad just laughed when I came down the stairs and said, “That’s funny. Now go put on real clothes.”
Too damn many people have just given up. I know a priest–a PRIEST!!!–who let his daughters have sex in the house when they were 15 because “he’d rather know where they are.” How about teach them they have more to offer than their bodies, or that their minds and character are what they need to be developing at 15, not their bedroom skills? Hell, if my kids decide, in defiance of all instruction and good sense, that they are going to have sex at an inappropriately young age, they will do it in a car or under the bleachers, in fear and trembling, like other all-American kids!
Kellye
on 18 Mar 2010 at 12:37 pm #
shannon, are you my sibling by a different mother/father? That’s how I was raised!!
A priest…unbelievable!
Alex Gittens
on 18 Mar 2010 at 4:00 pm #
I don’t think it was appropriate for a teacher to talk to a student that way, but I also don’t think it’s that big of a deal— it’s not as though the teacher called her a whore. A verbal reprimand would have been fine. Also, those leggings are borderline inappropriate, but not really deserving of a comparison with ho clothes: does that mean any woman wearing leggings looks like a ho?
She was just wearing inappropriately revealing clothes for her age. Also, correct me if I’m wrong, but young (preteen) girls wear leggings, no? So maybe part of the problem is the mixed signals: that it’s appropriate for you to wear this when you’re young and when you’re an adult, but not in between?
Alex Gittens’s last blog post..Nuclear norm stuff
THERREN DUNHAM
on 18 Mar 2010 at 10:48 pm #
Some very brief points:
1. An inappropriate but clearly not obscene outfit garnered an inappropriate but clearly understandable remark. And for that, both parties were punished. Life is balanced.
2. That said, knowing there’s no way in hell that I would allow my daughters to wear that out of the house, much less to school, I don’t see how this teacher deserves any award. However she felt about the girl’s outfit, it was not her place to sayhow she felt the way she said it. Any other word than “prostitute,” and this story would be a non-starter. Ther is such a thing as tact, and yes, I hold authority figures to a higher standard than the masses.
3. Now with THAT point said, I feel that authority figures include parents, too. and I think we all agree to some point that while nobody will ever appreciate hearing that their child resembles a prostitute without cause (and there was none here), We as parents have the ultimate responsibility to ensure that our kids don’t go out like that in the first place.
So Mom fails, teacher fails, and student fails, too. Porportions of blame are irrelevant to me; there’s fault on all sides.
(Last point: school uniforms are a well-intentioned but ineffective idea. JMHO)
AML
on 19 Mar 2010 at 1:05 am #
first of all, thank god you’re back!!!
i imagine the day when teachers just throw in the towel and say FUCK THIS, raise your own damn hooligans! i’d make the posters for free! it’s a sad, sad day in America when you children can’t be reprimanded by adults, guided toward simple public decency. you hit it on the head; where the hell is the moral compass, much less self-appreciation, pride, and dignity. i think her mama’s check should be cut off, afterall, we’re the ones paying for these bullshit shopping sprees!
kh20s
on 19 Mar 2010 at 11:21 am #
i don’t think that outfit was “prostitute”-like. It seems to be what a lot of young girls wear - leggings and t-shirts. It may just be me, but the young people of this generation seem to be a lot more “ample”, then just a generation ago. so leggings and a tight t-shirt on a beanpole look very different than when you’ve got curves.
the irony is that the mother said “when children are in school, the teachers are their parents”.
mercysayNo
on 19 Mar 2010 at 12:28 pm #
Ok, let’s bring this to a wrap.
I personally know this young lady. She’s an honor roll student, a
VIRGIN who’s keeping herself for marriage, why because she doesn’t
believe in premarital sex and wants to give that gift to her husband
ONLY. She weighs 85pounds, 5′1″ and is very petite, lets also keep in
mind that the camera adds weight onto a person. This young girl is not
the average young girl, she’s not into all that stuff as all think you
know about her, she’s not even into the dating scene yet, her head is
actually in the right place.
Most of you “adults” are passing judgment on a 14 year old that you
don’t know anything about. You all are saying this and that but have
you considered how it made her feel by reading these comments and/or
by what the teacher said to her. Right after the teacher sent her to
the office, the administrator said there was nothing wrong with what
she was wearing and sent her back to class. So that means something
isn’t right. I could understand if both parties were in agreement and
sent her home but if the school office said she was fine then the
teacher had a problem.
I’m not in agreement with the parents taking legal actions but the
fact that the teacher called her a prostitute is a defamation of
character and that will effect her emotionally…..that’s a form of
abuse. Do you know what that can do to a young person?
Let’s look at it from another perspective, what if that student had
called the teacher a prostitute, what do you think would’ve happened
to that student?
When you don’t know the facts or detail about something don’t speak
on it….Matthew 7:4 states “You hypocrite, first take the plank out
of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck
from your brother’s eye.”
Before you start checking someone, how about you take a very close
look at your own children, nieces, relatives….how are they, what
are they into, who are they into etc etc…I guarantee you, if the
light was on them, you wouldn’t be so bold in your comments.
Stay Bless!
Anonymous 13
on 19 Mar 2010 at 6:35 pm #
In response to mercysayNo, the teacher didn’t call her a prostitute. She said she was dressed like one.
The mother said in the interview (see the link in the second comment) that the teachers are almost like parents. The problem is they’re not. And who said that teachers “have to respect” kids? I’m sorry, but it needs to be the other way around. The parents should respect the teachers, as well.
Most of the people commenting are saying that it’s the parent’s responsibility to ensure that their children are dressed and acting appropriately for school. It should not be to get defensive at a minor criticism and “call her lawyer”.
By the way, it’s not a form of abuse. Saying that everything is a form of abuse is one reason why our kids are running wild and our society is in the mess that it’s in. Give me a break.
THERREN DUNHAM
on 19 Mar 2010 at 8:19 pm #
Thank you, mercysayNo, for giving us a little more depth on this situation, by sharing with us what you know of this person. While I doubt the info will change anyone’s minds, at least we know of her as more than just some stock figure in our ever-running episode of “Stereotypes Tonight.”
Though it’s nice to know that she’s not as depicted by others on this blog, I still feel that the outfit isn’t something I would let my child out of the house in. It’s not a point of chracter or morals (as it seems she has in abundance), but in taste (of which someone in that home lacks).
AML, you are so wrong for projesting your biases on this family. We don’t know these people’s financial situation, and I’ve seen many affluent (white) kids rock the same style. To equate this matter as one of poverty reeks of social elitism and economic snobbery. In short, it’s intellectually dishonest. I’m sorry, for my ‘hood peoples out there, that’s some BULLSHIT.
And for Anonymous 13, calling her outfit inappropriate wasn’t abusive; equating it to hooker gear was. The difference is the context. You never have to worry about being taken out of it if you learn to say it tactfully in the first place. Or are our teachers not supposed to reflect that when dealing with our kids?
No matter how we feel about this matter, the point I can’t stress enough is that we teach people how to act by the way we treat them. I feel that too often, kids act out because we act out; they disrespect us because we disrespected them. Now for all you touchy-feely liberaservatives out there (and yes, that was written as it’s meant), the reason that administrators have the clamps down on them is because way too often, those in authority abused the hell out of them, and laws were in place to (over-)compensate. They ran amok, and we turned a blind eye to them. Now we’re doing it to our kids.
But I digress; in the end justice was served. And if you don’t like what some high school kids is wearing in public, check your kids’ closets and make sure they’re not walking out your door in the same thing.
Tracye
on 19 Mar 2010 at 9:48 pm #
Jam, you didn’t just speak the truth, you hopefuly spoke to some parents who need to examine themselves daily as they watch not only their teen girls leave the house, but (pimp) young men who need checking too.
Miles Ellison
on 20 Mar 2010 at 1:15 am #
If anything, that mother should be apologizing. It isn’t the teacher’s fault that your daughter is a porn star in training.
Dorissa White on 21 Mar 2010 at 11:28 pm #
Preach Sister!
The Real Bianca
on 22 Mar 2010 at 2:37 pm #
Generally speaking, teenage girls dress like hookers. They are trying to figure themselves out on a sexual level. Some of them get through it and start to dress like a lady and some of them become actual hookers. That is the truth.
Check Mercy on here talking about this girls background like somehow being an honor student in high school is special. We all know how dumbed down the curriculum is so her status is a moot point. I have family members that graduated at the top of their class right before they had their first child and started working at the mall.
I blame the music.
mercysayNo
on 22 Mar 2010 at 3:33 pm #
@ Miles Ellison…what an idiotic comment from someone so wise.
Real Bianca….I’m speaking the truth, u on the other hand speaks ignorance.If the school curriculum is so horrible what are you doing about it, because you see its one thing to sit and complain but another to do something about it….I on the other hand, I’m doing something…I mentor teenage girls, you know the ones like this young lady.
You see the best way to know someone is when they’re place under pressure, how they react. How young people mind works is react now think later. After the situation occured with the teacher and student, most young people being embarrassed would’ve assulted the teacher and didn’t think twice about it…but what did this young lady do?
For all those on here who’s professing “when we were in school” nonsense is all crap. We all know the times has changed, (I personally wouldn’t allow my kids to go to school with leggins but she’s not my child). With that being said, I’m sure NONE of you went to school looking like a saint, most high schoolers then and now tries to fit in with the latest fashion trend…some extreme then others.
Now, what about your own kids, relatives etc…how are they leaving the house. You see those who are so quick to point the finger are those who are in a worse of a situation. The time you’re spending here degrading someone else’s child, what about yours…..when you inadvertently speak idle about someone, what happens to you is 100 times worse. {Matt 12:36}
Anonymous 13
on 22 Mar 2010 at 4:42 pm #
I love how the defensive ones always start with “all you’re doing is talk - I ACTUALLY do something”. Someone tried that with Jam in the comments on her article about fat women, and she got shut down. You don’t know if and how any of us “give back”. Perhaps you should stop judging others so freely, as that shortcoming seems to rile you so much.
I would like to say that I hope you’re not “mentoring” these young ladies in grammar, but I won’t.
Mojo
on 23 Mar 2010 at 11:39 am #
It’s not true that teenage girls dress like hookers cause of today’s music. I’ve seen some young black women in New York dress urban cute. Jeans, Uggs, a nice haircut, a nice handbag…and for the most part they look put together as all teenagers want to be…
Let’s not villianize our teens because of one sorry ass incident. A lot of why negativity continues to perpetuate is because we affirm it more than we should.
We tend to forget that we used to be teens and we all knew someone who was fast in the ass and craved attention in any form or fashion. But that’s the rub. Our children today get more negative attention than a warm hug, encouragement and discipline. More than likely that child who exposed herself was looking for negative attention and found it.
The day we start affirming our kids for the good things that they do is the day that blogs will dry up and no one makes money. Everyone knows that good news=boring news. How else will people’s ego’s be stroked if they didn’t have the negativity to focus on?
THERREN DUNHAM
on 25 Mar 2010 at 7:32 pm #
I guess in the (gag!) Real Bianca’s school district, they succeeded in banning the proliferation of dihydroxy monoxide from her town’s lakes and streams.
Generally speaking, teenage girls dress like teenage girls. Whether we think they dress like streetwalkers is a matter of conjecture, and irrelevant.
Being an honor student in high school IS special, regardless of your ZIP code or how you dressed for school. We are a society based as much on RESULTS we are on appearances. Some of the smartest and most competent people I ever knew looked like stick-up kids, while many (if not most) of the sorriest people in life rocked their “Sunday Best” seven days of the week. I dont know how dumbed down any high school’s curriculum is (and neither do you), so give her the credit that’s due. Were you an honor student? What were YOUR grades?
If you have family members that graduated at the top of their class right before they had their first child and started working at the mall, pehaps maybe you have no grounds to throw stones at this kid (or her mother, as it’s apparent that she’s doing SOMETHING right). It’s not the music, or institutional racism, or Affirmative Action, or the economy, or who’s in office, or the school board, or even the family tree.
It’s on that particular leaf.
I blame the music.
AML
on 28 Mar 2010 at 11:25 pm #
mercysayNO… who is Matt?
when throwing verses at us fallen ones, have some respect for the text.
shannon
on 28 Mar 2010 at 11:51 pm #
AML, be fair. Matt. is an accepted abbreviation for the Biblical book of Matthew, as Mk is for Mark, Lk is for Luke, I Cor. is for I Corinthians, Gen is for Genesis, etc. It’s not disrespectful to the text; it is how Biblical scholars refer to the books.
I knew that degree in religious studies would come in handy one day…
AML
on 30 Mar 2010 at 1:36 am #
yes, abbreviated, notated with a period (.), as you did.
Diane
on 31 Mar 2010 at 1:46 pm #
All I can say is parents need to be parents instead of passively letting their kids run wild. If you’re going to give birth to these kids then see the job through and guide them so that they can become repectable, responsible members of society. It is the parents job to raise their kids and to give them moral guidance the schools job to educate them. Do your job!
Dave on 01 Apr 2010 at 1:00 pm #
Let’s face it, the kid was dressed like a prostitute. She’s probably a good kid and just made a questionable call on the outfit. Could the teacher have said something in a more constructive way? Sure. And that needs to be addressed with that teacher. But the mother needs to get a little bit of a reality check. She needs to be the adult here and do what’s best for her daughter which is admitting that the outfit was inappropriate as well as the teacher’s comments being inappropriate.
Tami
on 02 Apr 2010 at 11:03 am #
The teacher should have worded what she said better. Unfortunately, we live in an age where we have to watch our language, and that goes for the teacher even if the kid was not dressed appropriately.
THERREN DUNHAM
on 02 Apr 2010 at 4:01 pm #
Why is that unfortunate? Why do we as members of what I thought to be a civilized society lament that its elders be held to a higher standard than its youth? THIS is why we see our children believing their wayward behaviors are okay; we’re living life backwards ourselves.
When we ask amongst ourselves what ever happened to decency, what ever happened to respect, what ever happened to discipline, how come we never stop to as what the hell ever happened to TACT? how do we expect children to address us appropriately if we don’t teach them by the way we address them?
And before (some of) you even say it, don’t give me any of that “I’m the parent” crap. That line doesn’t mean a whole lot when you’re 80 and frail, any more than “I’m the boss!” matters when you find a better job somewhere else. All you’re really telling them is “I have the power, and you don’t!” And what you’re teaching them is how to treat YOU when they have the power, as in “I can do the *^$! I want and you can’t stop me!” But by then, you’ll have plenty of time to reflect on that in your nursing home. Or empty apartment. Or surrounded by litters of mangy cats.
Dymon
on 03 Apr 2010 at 5:04 am #
Yes, indeed. I was really expecting to see a bona fide skank. The way the child was dressed (in the video that I saw) did not warrant the prostitute label or any references to it. I would agree with Most of the previous comments if that were the case. Since it isn’t, I have no stones to throw.
Yeah..no
on 21 Apr 2010 at 9:10 pm #
Slut shaming? I thought this blog was better than that.
Ms. M
on 22 Apr 2010 at 6:11 pm #
Preach! You hit the nail on the head with this one, Jam. These days many parents don’t want to discipline their children or arm them with a code of ethics and they dont’ want anyone else to either. We are damaging our children by failing to provide them with the truth. Thanks for this post!
Ms. M’s last blog post..Tryin’ To Get It Write
LaJuan on 27 Apr 2010 at 9:22 pm #
i find that some what of a double standard…girls need stipulations but boys can dress any way they want…i understand that girls should not leave the house looking like they are about to go shake some in a music video but young men should not men should not be able to leave the house and the whole world knows what color underwear he has on…me as a 16 year old female hate to see boys sag.. i think there is nothing cute about it but i also hate to see a girl looking like a hoe also..and personally..i make fun of them..and also being a 16 year old female..i like to look good in what i wear but i know there are ways to look sexy and classy at the same time..dnt get me wrong..i have rocked a halter top here or there..short shorts and belly shirts..but never to the point that i look like i am disrespecting my self but hey if that is what floats her boat and as far as the teacher calling her out on it…i don’t believe it was her place..that child’s mother knew what she left the house looking like..it is the mothers place to discipline her child not the teacher’s but then again i’m young so what do i know??
..MrssLahLahBby..
Marcus
on 20 May 2010 at 10:24 pm #
I was seriously expecting to see a girl wearing next to nothing the way people have been hyping this up. Since when are a t-shirt and leggings the domain of the prostitute? Is this a case of “it’s how you carry it,” where if it had been a girl with a little less junk in the trunk, it would have been a non-issue?
Hell if ANYthing, it reminds me of pictures I’ve seen of my older female cousins as teens in the 80s (the whole dance/aerobics gear-as-streetwear thing that was going on back then). And I KNOW that a good many of you were rocking that look back then. How is THIS any different?
Marcus’s last blog post..Why? Or, my purpose for this blog…
Robinson
on 01 Jun 2010 at 6:53 pm #
I was scrolling to say pretty much what Marcus said.
First of all, dress code can be enforced without resorting to humiliation (Sally, you know you’re supposed to have your shoulders covered at school, please go to the office; Mary, your skirt is too short for the school dress code, please go to the office). Second of all, I’d like to see the school’s dress code because that outfit would fly at my kids’ school. I think this was actually an issue of someone being uncomfortable with this young woman’s body type.
Robinson
on 01 Jun 2010 at 6:56 pm #
And, I just rewatched the video posted above and the office told the girl she was dressed appropriately. So, the teacher deserves an award, why?
Anonymous on 01 Jun 2010 at 7:25 pm #
She was covered, what was the problem? Even though you could claim that the teacher wasn’t TECHNICALLY calling the student a prostitute, being compared to one is hurtful. What about, “you’re dressed like a slut” or “you’re dressed like a whore”? According the logic being used, it wouldn’t be a problem, no one was TECHNICALLY called a slut or a whore. And yes, teachers should be respected, but they need to act like they deserve it. If the student told the teacher that she was dressed like a prostitute, what would happen? (and I know teachers who do dress inappropriately, teachers aren’t all saints). As long as the dress code was followed (was she covered up?) then the teacher should have kept her mouth shut. If someone told you that you were dressed like a prostitute, you would be upset. Just because it’s coming from a teacher doesn’t make it ok. (and I know some of you would say “oh, I would be happy and go change my clothes” no. no you wouldn’t, you would want an apology. I’m offended for this girl. What else can a teacher get away with saying? She should try this for a change, “Your clothes seem inappropriate to me”. So no, no one deserves a medal for talking disrespectfully to someone else. RESPECT GOES BOTH WAYS.
Peter D. Slaughter
on 06 Jun 2010 at 12:53 am #
Peace,a lot of these updated neo-negrow 21st century brainwashed slaves need to wake up bad.
It needed to be said for sure.
Only problem the girl’s mother seems to want
her daughter to be a stripper or some other updated slave type for the 21st century.
It’s crazy how a vast % of black folks seem to think we have some so-called black president
in some crack house in dc.Thing’s have changed
for the better.
We have went backward’s in time and most of
these negrow’s hollering for jesus don’t even know it.
Shana
on 10 Jun 2010 at 7:31 am #
I’M ON THE MAMMA’S SIDE. If that teacher was sooo concerned about the girl’s well-being, she wouldn’t have publicly humiliated her like that. As a young woman myself, I am so SICK of older women hating on the youngins and then trying to pass it for elderly wisdom… uh, we’re not dumb–there’s a huge difference and that’s why she got suspended.
Another thing- When will we stop blaming women and their clothing for the way that society thinks about and treats women? If a man is a rapist or misogynist or pedophile, there is NOTHING that a woman can possibly wear to change his mind; he’s just going to use clothes as a lame excuse for disrespecting/raping/beating women (and/or girls). Same logic behind racism; A racist will use baggy clothing as an excuse to not hire a young black guy. But the truth is, if he wasn’t required by law to hire all people regardless of their color, he wouldn’t hire ANY black guys. Forget the clothes. Period. Point blank.
Shana’s last blog post..Confession of a Neglectful College Student =/
altaf ahmed
on 05 Jul 2010 at 8:43 am #
hio i,m altaf ahmed here
Shay
on 16 Jul 2010 at 2:16 am #
What was wrong with what she had on?…She was covered…I don’t get it.